The first headline to catch my eye stated ‘UK is Slipping Down Global League Tables in Reading and Geography’. Apparently we’re languishing twenty places behind Estonia. It appears that few of our children would understand ‘languishing’ nor could they pinpoint Estonia on a map.
The next headline read ‘Overuse of Antibiotics is a Ticking Time Bomb’. Bacteria are cleverly adapting and becoming resistant to the drugs. The growing resistance poses a bigger danger to the nation than terrorism.
Depressed, I stopped reading, it seems our kids are getting dumber, bacteria are getting smarter… this is not going to end well.
Author’s note. As you’d expect, drabbles go through a number of iterations which can subtly change the feel of them. I thought it might be interesting to publish an earlier version of Newspaper Headlines below, so you can see how a story can evolve. For your information, the UK is slipping down the league tables in Mathematics, Reading and Science; not geography!
Newspaper Headlines (early version)
The first news headline to catch my eye stated ‘UK Slipping Down Global League Tables in Mathematics, Reading and Science’. Apparently we’re languishing (a word few of our children would understand) behind Estonia and Poland. Why did the newspaper name those two countries? Who knows?
The next headline read ‘Overuse of Antibiotics is a Ticking Time Bomb’. It seems bacteria are cleverly adapting and becoming resistant. The growing resistance poses a bigger danger to the nation than terrorism.
Depressed, I stopped reading, it seems our kids are getting dumber, bacteria are getting smarter… this is not going to end well.
Read the next drabble – The Leprechaun